Of Sinecures and The Bangles

Wow. I have really been slacking when it comes to writing this blog (which actually means either that I have been slacking less, or that I have found other ways to waste time, such as solving the 5 x 5 "Professor's" Rubik's Cube several times a day.)

I've decided that I need to write shorter, more frequent entries to this blog—not everything has to be a complicated mystery that needs to be solved. It could just be the dozens of things I look up on any given day.

For example, today I have looked up that a sinecure is, according to Webster's, "an office or position that requires little or no work and that usually provides an income." (Something I could use right now, incidentally.) It comes from from the medieval Latin sine cura, or "without cure of souls," apparently referring to ecclesiastical offices, the officeholders of which do not have the ability to, er, cure souls.

Also, my girlfriend was right: The Bangles did not write most of their big hits. (I've recently been enjoying two of their earlier songs, which appear on the Children of Nuggets compilation...one performed as The Bangles and one as The Bangs.) I knew "Manic Monday" was written by Prince (under the pseudonym "Christopher"), and that "Hazy Shade of Winter" was a Simon & Garfunkel song. I was willing to hope, though, that they'd written some of the other big ones. Turns out...no.

"Walk Like an Egyptian" was written by Liam Sternberg, a veteran of the Akron, Ohio "scene" which gave us Devo and The Waitresses. He offered the song to Toni Basil, but she turned it down. (This, in turn, led me to look up something I've been wondering since high school. Yes, it was the same Toni Basil responsible for "Mickey" who choreographed David Byrne in the "Once in a Lifetime" video.)

"Eternal Flame" and "In Your Room"? Written by Billy Steinberg and Tom Kelly, two songwriters I'm just hearing about now. These hit machines also wrote Madonna's "Like a Virgin," Cyndi Lauper's "True Colors," Whitney Houston's "So Emotional," The DiVinyls' "I Touch Myself" and Heart's "Alone," and co-wrote The Pretenders' "I'll Stand By You" with Chrissie Hynde.

Even earlier, pre–Top 40 singles were written by others: "Hero Takes a Fall" was a cover of a 1966 single by The Grass Roots, and "Going Down to Liverpool" was a cover of a Katrina and the Waves song. (I was horrified to learn that Kimberley Rew, who wrote "Liverpool" and the execrable "Walking On Sunshine" was the guitarist for my beloved Soft Boys. Hate? Meet Adoration.)

They did write many of the songs on their albums, though. If I'm not mistaken, the highest charting song that the band actually wrote was "Walking Down Your Street," which hit #11. And you know what? I still kind of like them. "Eternal Flame" is one of the best karaoke songs around, and "Walk Like An Egyptian" holds a special place in my heart because my friend Mike's dad, an ex-cop, couldn't wait for the DJ to play it at Mike's wedding so he could bust a hieroglyphic move. Also, I'm still kind of in love with Susanna Hoffs.

I actually came back to this blog because I got "tagged" in one of those "tell us about yourself and pass it around" Internet memes. I'll do that in the next entry... coming soon, I hope!